Friday, March 6, 2009

The Whingemen: Update!

It would seem we're safe... for now. I keep peeking out the windows, but I haven't spotted any signs of frantic rioting in the streets. Watchmen was released, and the world hasn't ended.

So that's something.

But online, the crazy continues. I can't look away!

In the Toronto Star, Malin Akerman is interviewed in an article entitled "Watchmen star adds a feminine touch to kicking butt." where it is suggested that the film's sexism is countered by having ladies in it. As everyone knows, women are sexism's kryptonite. The author explains how the film's underlying hate on the the dames is alleviated by women in latex kicking things. Then, in an astounding flurry of doublethink, he demonstrates how totally-not-objectified she is by describing what she's wearing.

"Fortunately, Watchman film director Zack Snyder had no problem with women being women and looking that way, too.

And in the case of Akerman, who is dressed for an interview in a burgundy Prada dress and jeans, she's gorgeous both on and off the screen."

"I will fight you with my feminism!"

Elsewhere, Hitler is pretty upset that they left out his favorite part. I can relate... I liked the squid, too. And the guys over at Cracked have a great idea for an alternate, studio-friendly ending. I'd warn you that the second link contains spoilers, but, really, doesn't everything? I read somewhere that the human body is something like 83% spoiler.

The opinions are out there, coalescing. Will you have yours, when they come for you? There comes a time when every moviegoer must stare into the depths of their self, and ask a truly penetrating question:

Which of the Watchmen babies is your favorite?

- Rook


  1. I had completely forgotten about the squidmonster, until about 5 minutes before it was supposed to happen. Then i was really happy when it didn't. The squid was stupid.

    This movie did not solve any of the conflicting feelings i have always had about the way moore wrote women in the book. In a few ways the film was even more problematic. I don't know, i have a lot to say about this.

    Do you think the watchmen babies have different age-appropriate names? Like maybe nightowl is night hatchling? Or is it just that all their names have "baby" in front?

  2. At least in the comic, the violence is presented ambivalently. That isn't to say that the women get off easily - or that there aren't some major problems with the writing (though Gibbons' eerily hollow silver age styling doesn't help things, either.)

    In the movie, everything is coated with a slick gloss of pure cool. The violence becomes stylized, and operates as visual punctuation. So suddenly, it isn't just a guy punching a woman.. it's a guy punching a woman sexily. That, plus the more pat resolution of Sally Jupiter's history (rape is bad, but babies are beautiful!) had me feeling a bit gutshot.

    But on the topic of women in Watchmen - would you like to write a post for the blog? We'd hook you up with a chess-appropriate avatar, and you could POST FOR GREAT JUSTICE.

  3. Oh, also, the baby version of Nite Owl is definitely not Night Hatchling. That would be lame.

    His name is "Hootie."

  4. hey brendan, i'd like to but i won't be able to get to such a post for a few days - way in over my head with other stuff. I'm keeping an eager eye on the bloggers over at to see if anyone takes up the topic there, as they'd write about it much more eloquently than i could. But if i can get my act together in the next few days, i will write and send you something to look over.